The Wisest Man I Ever Met

the wisest man I ever met by Matt Wall

sleep would not come
darkness did
cold surrounded me
I wrapped up beneath the blanket
tossed, turned, groaned, drooled
it wasn’t working
the sensation was unbearable
I thought for sure
if I just put it out of my mind
slumber would follow
I wiggled around
trying to find a spot
that didn’t make me feel like
bugs were crawling on me
things weren’t biting me
creatures were not burrowing inside me
nothing helped
I screamed to no one
at no one
for no reason
other than my sanity
in the dark,
I remembered something
a wise man said to me
I was a young boy
staying at my friends house
his father came in the room at bedtime
instead of saying goodnight
he said this:
“if you go to bed with an itchy butt,
you’ll wake up with stinky fingers.”
I sighed.
got up out of bed
and walked into the bathroom
in defeat.

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  1. You could have called this poem CE.

    CE is of course the difference between “defeat” and its evolutionary form, “defecate.”

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