I didn’t want to fart loudly

…because there were people
right outside the bathroom
window
on the sidewalk
I tried to keep it down
their conversation seemed
heavy

“All right! You better give me
My fucking money!
NOW!!!!!”

I listened a little longer
between my toilet noises

then
I became uninterested

wiped
flushed
washed my hands
flexed in the mirror …

“YOU FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT!”

I smiled at myself
thought about brushing
my teeth
then thought against it
since I was about to have dinner
but did decide
it was time for deodorant…

“I’LL FUCKING KILL YOU BITCH!”

I winked into the mirror
shot off some finger guns at myself
complete with mouth noises
went into the kitchen
made some coffee
with brandy in it
and waited for my
Japanese take out

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