on the toilet
I was reading the wrapping
that my toilet paper came in
it said how this toilet paper
was so much better than other
toilet paper
because it’s like wiping with a rag
instead of paper
then it had a hashtag
a fucking hashtag!

are you fucking serious?
are people supposed to tell their
experiences wiping their assholes
and use the hashtag #CharminClean
to help sell some rolls?
who the fuck would ever do that?
Twitter is a strange place
with strange people
but are they that ridiculous?

they also have their Facebook and
Twitter icons and
they want you to “join the conversation”
and finally,
it says, “remember to enjoy the go”
the “go” they are referring to
is the “shit”

what kills me
is that some douchebag
probably got a corner office
for that idea


I wiped
didn’t really notice a huge difference
I guess if I don’t smell like shit later
I will know

Bookmark the permalink.

Comments are closed.