murdered frat boys

I pulled up to Walmart
but still had a cig burning
I decided to finish it
before getting out of the car.
Madness was playing on the
stereo.
then,
oh fuck, the bloody “then”,
this new sliver hatchback
parked next to me.
out of it came two
identical assholes.
black polo shirts
khaki shorts
shades
same stupid haircut.
one fucker said, “damn I can’t
believe how long that car ride was!”
“yeah, bro!” said the second douche bag.
this meant that they were from out
of town..
ignoring the stay-at-home order
ignoring social distancing.
I was getting angry
but they walked off quickly enough.
two drags of my smoke later
they were back
huffing and puffing
cussing and bitching
about how fucking stupid it was that
Walmart made them go back to the car
and get their masks.
they said all sorts of idiotic things
that made rage fill up my chest
and move up my neck and shoulders
I put my smoke out
got out of the Matt-Moblie
cracked my knuckles
pushed the button on my
Chain Chomp key chain to lock the car
and followed them
with more burning hatred
than they had
for having to walk back to their car.

these are the same fuckers
that will grow up in two years
and be the bankers
brokers
real-estate agents
loan specialists
and every other kind of bullshit
job that makes guys like me
want to go on some sort of spree
where people end up dead.
these douchy fucks.

I followed them close
they were in a hurry
they ran right passed the baskets
I needed one.
they were a bit ahead of me
but once I got the tomatoes,
I had lost them.
I looked around for a few minutes
while upholding social distancing rules
but never saw them again.
I thought about it after
how the hell was I going to
make their faces bleed
and their bones make those sweet
cracking and popping sounds
that I like so much
while staying 6 feet away from them?
I guess it’s good they got away,
my arms are very short.

be sure to pick up my book THE END OF EVERYTHING available now at Indiegogo!

Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *